Navigating the Sandwich Generation: Caring for Others Without Losing Yourself

By: Bec Harris

“You can’t pull from an empty cup,” says Deb Childs, CEO of Helping Minds. She speaks about the unique challenges of the sandwich generation. People caring for both aging parents and their own children.

What Is the Sandwich Generation?

Deb explains: “The sandwich generation refers to people, often in their 30s, 40s, or 50s, caring for both aging parents and children.”

This situation is rising. People live longer, and many have children later in life. Caring for two generations while working full-time creates immense pressure, especially for women.

According to Carers Australia, 1 in 9 Australians are in an unpaid caring role. That’s roughly 2.65 million people, with 1.2 million unaware they are even carers because it’s part of daily life.

Burnout and Mental Health

“Burnout isn’t just tiredness. It can be physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion,” Deb warns. Carers often neglect themselves while meeting everyone else’s needs. Without proper self-care, stress and exhaustion build over time, affecting both mental health and relationships.

Practical Self-Care Tips

Deb emphasises the importance of putting on your own oxygen mask first:

Ask for help when needed.
Take short breaks. Even a 15-minute walk or a cup of tea can help.
Set boundaries and recognise your limits.
Prioritise activities that bring joy and energy.

“We all love to give, but we need to look after ourselves to stay strong for others,” she says.

Planning Ahead

Early conversations with parents can help reduce stress. “Talking about care preferences or end-of-life plans can prevent crises later,” Deb explains.

Resources like Carer Gateway and local support groups provide guidance and social connection, which research shows is vital for resilience.

Recognising Signs of Burnout

Deb notes key red flags:

Physical or emotional exhaustion
Loss of patience or irritability
Feeling nothing is ever enough
Social withdrawal
Trouble concentrating or making decisions

“Our bodies aren’t designed for constant stress. You need to actively look after yourself,” she says.

Fill Your Cup First

Deb concludes with this essential message: “Being a carer means giving a lot, but you’re not supposed to give all. Fill your cup first so you can keep showing up for the people you love.”

Caring for others is challenging, but with support, boundaries, and self-care, carers can protect their well-being while supporting their families.

Article supplied with thanks to Sonshine.

Feature image: Canva